BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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