Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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