Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
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If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
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HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
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