I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Randomize