a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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