I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
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