Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
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