Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Randomize
