They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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