so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
