Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
