Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
