hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
