on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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