Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
