WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
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