so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
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