Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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