its not stalking. its research.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Randomize
