Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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