How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
