WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
