Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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