my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize