WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
