Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
