so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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