is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
