Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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