So drunk, too bad you don't want this
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
