We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Randomize
