...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
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I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
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It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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