...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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