I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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