I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
