just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
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i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
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We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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