he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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