Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
