marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
