hotel room ftw
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
she pinky promised me she was 18
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Randomize