If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
This toilet bowl is my home.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
Randomize
