Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
