Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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