Welp...herpes.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
