Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
