therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize