Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
BRING THE BAGELS
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
