i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
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