; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
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