I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
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yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
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I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
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