that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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